First things, first…

Restaurant Etiquette

To the impatient couple + friend who came in right after us on opening week at one of the most anticipated restaurant openings in the 4th largest city in U.S. Thursday, June, 9, 2016 around 6:00 p.m. to be exact, you know who you are, let me tell you a little something about restaurant etiquette at a brand new/super busy restaurant. NEVER seat yourself at the bar without asking the hostess first for a couple of reasons. 1) You don’t know if the bar is open seating, and 2) (and most importantly), there were two parties in line before you, so if it was open seating, the people waiting should have the option to sit first, not the jerks who circumvent the line and the hostess stand. Nobody likes cutters. Rant over. Now onto the important things... eats and dranks.

Vino

We ordered a bottle of the 2014 Bastianich Sauvignon Blanc. It was like a bright punch in the mouth. Myself and my two dinner companions loved it so much we bought another bottle later. Additionally, why wouldn’t you love a Bastianich wine. They wrote the book on Italian wines. Literally.

Antipasti

For our appetizer we ordered the burrata. I am addicted to cheese, this is a real thing, so I don’t feel bad admitting it and talking about my problem, but we decimated that super creamy goodness. If you’re not familiar with burrata it’s basically heaven in your mouth. But in all seriousness it is a super creamy, silky version of Mozzarella. Literally, it is mozzarella and cream. You eat it spread on grilled bread or like me by the forkful. I honestly do not think there is a better combination in this world than fat and carbs. Burrata and bread satisfies the craving for that combo. You know what else does? Pizza.

Pizza

True Neapolitan pizza is a big deal. You have to go through training and get certifications, and you have to have a special kind of pizza oven that heats up to temperatures hotter than hell, but that’s what makes it so special. My cousin treated me to the Deep Ellum Cane Rosso a few years ago and fell in love instantly because it was the closest thing I had ever tasted to the real Italian pizza that caused me to pack on 25 lbs. when I lived in Italy some years back. So when I heard we were getting one in Houston, I pretty much waited with bated breath as I drove past the location, wondering when it was going to open.

Because my friends and I enjoy tasting all the things, we ordered three different pizzas. We had the Ella, the Joan Marie, and the Prosciutto e Rucola. Now let me expound.

ELLA
hot soppressata, san marzanos, housemade mozzarella, basil

Unpretentious in toppings, it was quietly my favorite. Simple and strong. Bold and classic flavors. The sopressata was a little spicier than we expected it to be. I thought it was quite delicious, and like I said, it’s suited towards those with a simple palate looking for a classic pizza fix. This is a no-nonsense pizza that satisfies the craving for something akin to traditional pepperoni.

THE JOAN MARIE
pepperoni, housemade mozzarella, goat cheese, roasted jalapeno pesto

Of the three pizzas we ordered, this one was the most inventive, and visually striking. It comes out looking like Jigsaw’s cheeks. Hypnotizing you with its cheese, pepperoni, and spirally jalapeño/pesto goodness. You would think it would be spicier than the Ella with the jalapeño pesto, but no, it’s not. It just offers a more nuanced kick in the mouth. This was my second favorite.

PROSCIUTTO E RUCOLA
prosciutto crudo, arugula, housemade mozzarella, shaved parmigiano, garlic, extra virgin olive oil

I ended up ordering the prosciutto e rucola pizza because the other two were spicy. I was honestly underwhelmed. Probably because I don’t particularly care for prosciutto. This pizza was only meh for me. I should have ordered the VEGETALE instead, that’s what I really wanted.

Overall, I would totally go again, and next time, I will be trying one or multiple, if not all of the following: VEGETALE, DELIA, PAULIE GEE, CANE ROSSO, and CHE CAZZO. Let’s be honest. I will probably eventually make my way through the whole menu.

Lastly, If I could offer my suggestions for a pizza, and this comes inspired by a small pizzeria I used to frequent while camping in Marina di Castagneto Donoratico, but it was speck (Italian bacon), mascarpone, and rucola. OHMYGOD. so good. Just a thought. Someone let me know if that ever happens. And then can you name it after me? La Principessa. K, thanks.